Fatwa #1414911 April 2006Pakistan
have a friend who has a brother who is gay. He has has this disease for some time now about 3/4 years. He announced this to the family and wanted the family to accept him as he is
Question
I have a friend who has a brother who is gay. He has has this disease for some time now about 3/4 years. He announced this to the family and wanted the family to accept him as he is. The family refused to accept his lifestyle and offered advice and help to deal with his issue. After trying, he refused to change his ways and was adamant that this is how he will live his life. I am an Alim myself and despite trying to help him in the light of Quran and hadith he has not changed. Because the family weren't willing to compromise their imaan, he decided to leave and is now working in France. I do not know whether the family were right in doing what they did. He has gone to the extent of even calling the police on his own family. The family think he may be posessed. Most recenlty he has e-mailed his family and has asked for help despite being pesimistic about him changing.
Please Mufti Saheb, if this was your own son or brother how would you deal with it ina practical sense in the light of the quran and sunnah. Should the family bring him into the home where there are many other family crisis when he has in the past asked for help but has gone behind the family's back in continuing to commit homosexuality. Once again i am sure you can appreciate what the family must beinggoing through and requset your urgent help and guidance.
Answer
We hope you are well. We commend you for your effort in trying to assist the family in their difficulty.
Nevertheless, the modern society have indoctrinated and encouraged youngsters to become homosexuals and lesbians. This is further supported by the fact that many Government Constitutions of the worlds sanction same gender marriages. This boy who has taken up this unbecoming lifestyle has become influenced by his peers and associates. He is young and ambitious. He will go all out to fulfill his passion and desire in whatever way comes to his mind. Furthermore, in a state of drunkenness to fulfill his desire, he will never be influenced by anyone including his own parents and seniors. The warnings of the Quraan may also fall on deaf ears which also could jeopardize his Imaan.
Our experience in such cases is that after the family has exhausted all possible ways and means to rehabilitate the person, they should show love and compassion to the victim. There could be two possible scenarios to this. One is the victim could reflect over the past and make Tawbah and mend his/her ways and change. Secondly, the victim could abuse the love and continue with the past ways. Then in all possibilities the victim may not change their attitude. The family may then seek counsel from professionals in this field and make decisions in view of their advice and guidance.
And Allah Knows Best
Muhammed Zakariyya Desai
Student: Darul Ifta
Checked and Approved: Mufti Ebrahim Desai