Fatwa #1116923 March 2004United States of America
Father has died, needs advice on well-being of family structure! Sisters dress tight, have poor attitudes, do not take hijab, and want to constantly be out alone. I am the only son..
Question
We argue day and night about who is wrong and right. Sisters dress tight, have poor attitudes, do not take hijab, and want to constantly be out alone. I am the only son in the house after the death of my father. Allah yirhamo. I am not perfect either, I dont always pray my 5 prayers, i have stresses and we argue non stop in my home since the death of my father. I know I should become closer to my Islam Inshallah. But WHAT should I do as far as guiding my sisters and guiding my mother on what to say and do towards us (the kids)? I just want my family to be good muslims and get along and make it to Jannah Inshallah ! Please Advise? Asalaamu ALaikum w rahmatullahi w barakathu.
Answer
May Allah Ta'ala grant your father Jannatul Firdous - May He shower His Mercies on your family, aameen.%0D%0A%0D%0ADear brother the common cliche 'Practice what you preach' It is true, we cannot ask someone else to practise whilst we continue with our wrongdoings. Also do remember everyone in your family was affected by your father's demise and probably felt the pain.%0D%0A%0D%0AYou as a brother possibly shoulders many responsibilities. Start off - with yourself Adjust your attitude, take stock, start being kind and showing love to your family, ask about their well-being, smile- see to their needs, exchange gifts - for building of love. This will Insha-Allah build their confidence in you and soften your relationship..%0D%0A%0D%0AThen on a personal level make sincere Tauba for all your sins and start putting things right. Make a firm intention and move to read you 5 times salaah and all the areas you need to put right, atleast make the effort.%0D%0AYou will not need to give lectures to your sisters, your very own practise will be an example and motivation. Allah Ta'ala will Insha-Allah become pleased with you.%0D%0A%0D%0ADo try - let us know your outcomen as you make your changes in life.%0D%0AMay Allah Ta'ala help you and grant you success.%0D%0A%0D%0Aand Allah Ta'ala Knows Best%0D%0A%0D%0A2SOCIAL DEPT.%0D%0A%0D%0ACHECKED & APPROVED: Mufti Ebrahim Desai