I did my Nikkah in Dec 2002. She blames to me I blame to her. I feel depress all the time, and am very much worried about future...

Masha-Allah we commend you for seeking Deeni advice. Firstly ponder on our life. Marriage - was there pre-marital courtship? Was there an elaborate function contrary to what our Beloved Nabi (Salallahu Alayhi Wasalam) guided us on? Or reflect on our past and present, have we lived our lives to what Nabi (Salallahu Ayahil Wasalam) taught, or are we following the Eastern and Western customs?%0D%0A%0D%0AThe first step to seek release from problems and difficulties is to sincerely repent on all sins from the time we became of age till now- with regret and remorse and seeking Allah's help to change our lives to His Ta'ala's obedience. (N.B. Nabi (Salallahu Alayhi Wasalam) being Ma?soom repented 100 times a day - so what about us sinful people?) Note: - Many have positively noted release from difficulties with repentance.%0D%0A%0D%0AThereafter - 2ndly - Option - making the correct effort. How often do you overlook her faults? How often have you expressed words of Love and appreciation to her. Before Nikah, courtship is Haraam - after Nikah courtship is a blessing. How often do you smile at your wife when you come home? %0D%0A%0D%0AWe ask you to ponder on this not to find fault however making these necessary changes are where many marriages have succeeded , All Praise is to Allah, Alhumdulillah, with positive outcomes. %0D%0A%0D%0ADo note the missing link in the world is 'LOVE' Try it! shop and express your love with deep hearted feeling. Initially you may not receive the desired reaction as she will be suspicious or wondering at this strange change - But perseve and you will note the change and the Love that you will be receiving in return. Did she like the flowers, chocolates, gifts, cloths yuo may have showed her before, when lasy did you do it, perhaps surprise her - see the sparkle in the eye , Praise on her positive qualities and admire her beauty verbally to her. A definate No NO to saying anything negative to her. If it slips out, apologise - this will not lower you but will gain her respect. N.B. you making the effort will Insha-Allah earn a positive response . Make the correct intention that 'My Allah will be pleased with me restraining my anger and making the efffort' Make lots of Dua and then resign the Will to Allah Ta'ala whatever the outcome (Tafweez).%0D%0A%0D%0AIf you've tried and made sincere efforts from your side and saught forgiveness and repented and still you experience difficulty, then your Sabr (patience) will most certainly be rewarded by Our Kind and Compassionate Allah Ta'ala - Insha-Allah.%0D%0A%0D%0AMany have become pious or awarded special gifts for their Sabr. But Sabr must not be after you 've vented frustrations. %0D%0A%0D%0AAnd Allah Ta'ala knows best. %0D%0A%0D%0AYou may repond further should you or your wife require any advice. Jazakallah Khair in your confidence in us.%0D%0A%0D%0Aand Allah Ta'ala Knows Best%0D%0A%0D%0A2SOCIAL DEPT.%0D%0A%0D%0ACHECKED AND APPROVED: Mufti Ebrahim Desai%0D%0A