Fatwa #323911 June 2001Canada
I consider myself a practising Muslimah I have guy friends is keeping some as close friedns affect my proposals?
Question
I am a young female and I believe I am ready to get married. However I have not gotten any proposal that I like. I wear hijab and I am a practising Muslim and the proposals I get are from people who don't pray or are not serious about their religion. My brother says that I have to correct myself and then Allah will bring a religous one to me. I have some guys friends that I talk to, I don't like them but I just talk to them since I've known them since childhood. I am close to only one of them but I do not want to marry him but I see him as a close friend my brother says to end such relationships and make things halal and then Allah will help me. He says that Allah wants to see me do what's pleasing for HIM in order for HIM to please me. Is there any truth to what my brother is saying? I am thinking that I will not get a good husband and I might give in sooner or later to one who is not religious. Can you please help me and explain if what my brother says is true.
Answer
Hazrat Abu Hurairah (RA) narrates that Rasulullah (Sallallaahu Alayhi%0D%0AWasallam) said, 'When a person proposes a marriage to you (for a female in%0D%0Ayour family) and you are happy with his religion and character, then marry%0D%0Ahim (accept his proposal). If you do not do that, there will be corruption%0D%0Aand widespread evil on earth.' (Mirqaat, Ali ibn Sultan vol. 6 pg. 192 -%0D%0AMultan)%0D%0A%0D%0AThe above hadith provides two guidelines for a female to consider a%0D%0Aproposal:%0D%0A%0D%0AOne) The males adherence to Deen.%0D%0ATwo) The males good character.%0D%0A%0D%0AIn order to establish and maintain a successful marriage, both guidelines,%0D%0Aadherence to Deen and good character are equally important. However, the%0D%0Alevel of the boys adherence to Deen (for example keeping a beard and pants%0D%0Aabove the ankles etc.) is not been specified in the Shariah. It is left to%0D%0Athe discretion and satisfaction of the guardians of the proposed girl.%0D%0AObviously their concern is the girls peace and prosperity. In a reply to a%0D%0Asimilar question from a concerned father, Moulana Ashrah Ali Thanvi replied,%0D%0A'I . that full religiousness is not to be found in bearded people. One%0D%0Ashaves the beard, one is irreligious in other ways so what will you do with%0D%0Aonly the beard. Look at two things: 1) no doubt in Islamic beliefs. 2)%0D%0Arespectful of elders and saints, and kind hearted to fulfill his duties and%0D%0Awith some wealth. Then with increasing relationship no matter his beard will%0D%0Aalso grow. A father approached Hazrat Hasan Basri (RA) saying, I have only%0D%0Aone daughter and received many proposals for her. Which proposal should I%0D%0Aaccept? He replied, accept the proposal of a person who fears Allah, if he%0D%0Aloves your daughter, he will honour her, and if he dislikes her, he will%0D%0Aoppress her. (Mirqatul Ali-ibn Sultan vol. 6 pg. 188 - Multan).%0D%0A%0D%0Aand Allah Ta'ala Knows Best%0D%0A%0D%0AMufti Ebrahim Desai%0D%0AFATWA DEPT.%0D%0A