Fatwa #20976 February 2001United Kingdom
I am doing istikharah for marriage but how do I know which decision I'm supposed to take?
Question
Respected Mufti Saab, How do I know what Istikharah is telling me? I am in the process of doing istikarah for marriage but how do I know which way Allah is telling me to go? I mostly do not get dreams and sometimes in the morning after I wake up my heart goes one way but by evening i gets completely changed. Sometimes, also I try to think how the item in istikarah will work out logically and then I get doubts etc... - should I do this or just listen to my heart when doing istikarah?
Answer
In the Name of Allah, the Most Gracious, the Most Merciful.
As-salāmu ‘alaykum wa-rahmatullāhi wa-barakātuh.
Moulana Badre Alam Mirathi (RA) writes in his footnotes of the popular commentary of Bukhari, Faydhul Baari by Allaamah Anwar Shah Kashmiri (RA) regarding the reality of istikhāra.
He states, in other words, it is sometimes misunderstood from the statements of the Ulama that it is promised in the hadith of istikhāra that the heart of a person who performs istikhāra will incline towards one option, whereas many a time the person who performs istikhāra does not perceive such an inclination.
He says the hadith of istikhāra does not contain anything pertaining to the inclination or satisfaction of the heart. Had it been such, Nabi (Sallallaahu Alayhi Wasallam) would have taught us in the dua to ask Allah to incline the hearts towards the most appropriate decision, whereas the hadith does not say that.
The dua only contains this much that, Allah Ta’ala should protect him from harm and should determine a good fate for him, whatever it may be. And the words of the dua, ‘And turn me away from it,’ means that when the heart is desirous to go ahead with the matter regarding which istikhāra is being made, then may Allah Ta’ala turn the heart away from it by removing this desire and inclination from the heart.
Our responsibility is to make dua and make mashwara (consultation) and then proceed in the direction of one’s choice as that will be best for him. This means that he will be granted the tawfiq (ability of the best only and only the best will be made and easy for his). Thus, istikhāra is an act that helps to determine the best for a person. In essence, istikhāra is a dua seeking the assistance of Allah. After that, whatever direction a person takes will be for his betterment even though his heart may be disinclined to it.
You may also refer to Ask Imam #30868 for further details.
And Allah Ta’āla Knows Best
Mufti Ebrahim Desai