Fatwa #1409022 March 2006United Kingdom
my mother and father in law and husband keep playing tricks and constantly doing black magic on me. My in-laws want to take control all the time
Question
I got married last year my mother and father in law and husband keep playing tricks and constantly doing black magic on me. My in-laws want to take control all the time. They want me to work and take care of their family.
My husband is so deaf and dumb he only does what his family says he does not judge what is right or wrong. He will not give me any money or buy me food. I got pregnant last year and my mother in law did black magic and I lost my baby since then I have not got pregnant again. My in-laws have kept my husband away from me for eight weeks now over stupid arguments.
This is the 2nd time I have got married and I still love my husband and want to save my marriage. All I want is my husband to be honest with me and respect me and love me and treat me like a proper wife. I have also been told that my husband and his family only got married to me for a Visa once he gets this he will divorce me. Please help me I am very desperate all that everybody keeps telling me is divorce him but I don’t want that.
Please Mufti Saab help me save my marriage and also I want another baby. Can you give me something dua, Surat, Tawiz.
Answer
Jazakallah for writing to the institute regarding the problems you are facing in your marriage. Sister, it appears that your family has already addressed and dealt with the problems you are having. Have you tried to get a senior imam or the ulema involved in dealing with this situation? It must be difficult for you when you find that you cannot seem to get through to your husband. You mention that your in laws are interfering in your marriage. You obviously need the help of senior family members and / or the imam. If that does not produce any results, please go to a social worker for further help. You mention a serious problem which your family has pointed out to you about him wanting a visa only. Ask them to confront him about it as soon as possible. If you find that this is true, then you have to face reality that he may not be sincere about this relationship.
It is understandable that you want to solve your problems and remain in the marriage but it needs two people to make a marriage. Have you told him that this is your wish and that you want to work on making your relationship become stronger and that you want to make a home with him no matter what?
How did he react to this request? If he was negative in his response, allow me to point out to you that this is not the time to think about having a child. You are undergoing a great deal of emotional strain and loss. Your health may suffer if you now decide to fall pregnant and if you do not have any emotional and financial support from your husband. You should focus on your relationship with your husband rather than what your in laws are doing.
If your husband is not prepared to fulfill his obligations to you as his wife, then there is a major hurdle you have to overcome. Please sister, ask your family to consult with him as soon as possible so that you can resolve this issue and know where you stand. It is not healthy for you to go on like this without knowing if your husband is serious about making a home with you or not. May Allah Ta'ala guide both of you and help you to resolve this problem amicably. Ameen.
And Allah Ta'ala knows best.
Sister Fadila
Social Dept.
CHECKED & APPROVED: Mufti Ebrahim Desai