i hear many peoples versions but what is the actual meaning of treating wives equally in reference to polygamy.

Having more than one wife is permissible and appropriate only on condition that equality can be maintained among all wives as required under the Shariah of Islam, and that the rights of all be duly fulfilled. If one does not have the capability to discharge his obligations in this manner, the rule is to keep to only one wife. One needs to have the capability or quality to treat all of them equally and justly without causing the least infringement of their rights. The Holy Prophet sallahu alaihi wa sallam has laid great emphasis on maintaining full equality and justice between all wives and he has given stern warnings against those who do otherwise.

In a hadith, the Holy Prophet sallahu alaihi wa sallam has said:'Anyone who has two wives and he cannot fulfill their rights equally and justly, shall be raised on the Day of Judgment in a condition that one of his shoulders! will be drooping down.' (Mishkat, p.278)

We should, however, keep in mind that this equality of treatment is necessary in things which are within the control of man. For example, the coverage of personal expenses and parity in overnight stays. It refers to the justice in matters of choice and volition. Any discrepancy in this is a great sin. As for things out of man's control, such as the natural inclination of his heart which might tilt towards one of them, there is no accountability there for this is not a matter of choice. However, the binding condition is that this tilt should not affect matters which are within man's control.

So, anyone who thinks of having more than one wife should first think about all those factors and conditions around him and more importantly, look into himself, and figure out realistically whether or not he has the ability to treat all of them equally and justly without causing the least infringement of their rights.

Allah (swt) is over the throne (Istiwaa alal arsh)- This Ayat is from amongst the Mutashaabihaat. If one believes Allah is mustawee and over the arsh but does not imagine its condition in a specific way but rather leaves this meaning up to Allah then namaaz behind such an Imam is valid.

Reference: Ma'ariful Quran, vol. 2 Surah Al-Nisa, pg. 310-313

and Allah Ta'ala Knows Best

Mufti Ebrahim Desai